Sigh. Let me whine. I get this disconcerting series of comments regularly lately. They usually go in about this fashion, pardon me if I get it a bit off….
“You always look SO cute and put together! I could never pull that off!”
“I don’t have the TIME to look as polished as you do!”
“Wow. Your hair and make up! Always perfect! I bet your husband totally loves it!”
You get the basic idea. What girl doesn’t love to get a complement? I’m getting a bit older! I’ve had kids and cancer and life so yeah, it’s nice to feel pretty. It’s just that some of these comments are laced with an edge. Because some are followed by things like,
“It must get awfully tiring to do all that. I just don’t bother.”
“Wow, your daughter must learn a lot from you. Is it all intimidating?”
“Bet this gets harder as you get older!”
That’s really sorta weird, don’t you think? Let’s talk about this. I have always appreciated the mystique and beauty of strong femininity. There is nothing saying a woman in heels and red lipstick cannot have quiet command over everything she does. There’s also nothing saying that the woman in sweats and flip flops isn’t smart enough to run a corporation. I like having command over my self and presence. I like that people get a pretty clear read of the kind of woman I am when they look at me.
Because it’s not just about doing my make up and hair, or wearing a nice outfit or diet and exercise. It is about how I walk into a room and treat other people. But, how can I treat other people decently if I don’t feel good about myself. That is the catch-22. I don’t actually need tons of compliments.
I need to feel pulled together. I need to feel ready to face my day. I like feeling comfortable. My own comfortable actually is a polished outfit, nice make up, pretty hair, and smelling good. These little touches remind me that no matter what comes through my day ‘I got this!’. There is nothing wrong with enjoying glamour and the idea that, as a mom, you should put that on the back burner, makes me laugh.
Feminism happens whether you are wearing diamonds, flannels, or both. Being your own person simply means owning your best self. So, do I have a routine? Yes. Does it help me feel like a stronger, more confident woman. Yup. Does it define me? No. It outlines me.
I will say that I don’t do this to please other people. I do it for me. With an exception that probably sends me straight back to the 1950’s in most people’s eyes. I do take care of myself in part, for my husband. Yes, I said that. I said it because I think in any relationship, the care you take of yourself spills over into being a more confident and caring partner. I do care that my husband looks at me, smiles, and thinks “Dang, am I lucky!” Because I think that of myself when I look at him!
Bare-faced is beautiful too. Especially when you take care of yourself. When you actually drink enough water, get enough exercise, have a decent mind set, most days you’ll wake up looking decent. It’s important to always know that you, yourself, are enough. Beauty is your own.
There is a difference. By the way, I think those flannels and that bare face is just as beautiful. Just own it, sisters.
Sparkles and Glitter -